My father died in 1986 and my world as I knew it changed forever. Growing up and having my father around was great. I took it for granted that he would always be around. I was only 13yrs old when he died and I never wanted anyone else to take his place. There was a void in my life with his passing away that I never knew would happen.
I have otherwise been blessed with a few male role models in my life, they might not regard themselves as father figure but they have played a role in my life that I will forever be grateful to them all the days of my life
My brother Julius also known as Diran stepped up to the plate when Daddy died. He was a young man himself needing his father but he just really rallies us together and was there for us all. I remember when I arrived in London in 1989, how he took good care of me. He helped me to get my first job working at McDonald. He failed to tell me why we were going there though.
I was so excited thinking he’s going to buy me my favorite McChicken sandwich with vanilla milk shake. Until we got there and his friend the manager came out and they both started talking about me like I wasn’t there. My mind was still fixated on the food to come and I wasn’t paying much attention to their conversation, until he said I would be back to start work the following day. Suffice to say he didn’t buy me any McChicken sandwich before leaving too.
Aside from that, he is dependable, reliable and always finds time to be there for me whenever I call. He is the ultimate peacemaker in our family; often he is stuck between settling dispute between my sister, mum and me. He managed to always find something we can always agree on regardless of how much we all really feel. He is an accountant by profession, but I think he can help bring peace to the conflict in the Middle East. He is a Christian, husband, father and he has a great heart to see his family live in harmony. He is a great listener and gives selflessly. Many times he has come to my rescue and I am forever grateful, some might think that is what brothers are supposed to do. Oh yeah? Well not all do it.
Tragedy can either bring the worst in you or allow your inner strength to rise up. That was the case with my brother; he went from being a young lad to becoming a man that had to take care of a whole family. While his friends were living it up, he had to work hard to support us financially and many other ways. He kept a roof over my mother’s head and paid off the outstanding mortgage on my father’s house. He has never asked for a penny or any recognition for all that he did.
He has also been someone that truly believes in me and always encouraging me to go for gold. We may not talk often but I know I can always pick up my phone and talk to him anytime.
Four years ago, after moving from Lafayette, Louisiana to Houston, Texas. We were told of a church called Houston Worship Centre that we should check it out while trying to find our home church. We walked in on a midweek service, amazing praise and worship and the word was fresh and powerful. From the very first time we knew this was going to be our church. It has been 4 years since and we have never regretted that decision. At HWC, not only did we find our family we also find our spiritual parent in Pastor Randy and Lucie Needham.
They never asked us about our past, they were never interested in that part of our lives. All they have been interested in is our future, they spoke life into us in a way no other father had done into my own life since my dad died. The more life he spoke, the more I started to believe that maybe I can aspire to do the things he was speaking over me.
Then I started to see what I had been missing out on all this time. A father’s role is more than just providing warm, shelter and food. One of the most important roles of a father is to speak life into your life. It takes a father to spot potential, the diamond in the rough, and then nurture it to its full potential. There is an authority and blessing that only a father can command and if we know our places as children and allow fathers to take their rightful position it will be to our benefit.
We see the impact of a father’s word in the life of their children throughout the bible; a good example is that of Jacob declaring blessing unto the 12 tribe of Israel
Fathers also bring correction to our lives, I for one know that there has been an absence of that in my life. You cannot live your life on your own terms and not be accountable to no one. Who corrects you and speak the truth in love when you are off the mark? Are you just a law to yourself? No wonder our prisons are full of fatherless men and women in prisons.
Mother does a great job but there is the absence of good male role models in the world currently. The world is missing out on great fathers that can change the course of a child’s life for the better. There is a part fathers are meant to play; men are just not sperm donors. Women often don’t know much about the male species yet we are left with the daunting task of raising sons.
I know that there are many homes that are single parents’ homes, mothers doing a fine job and I applaud you all. It saddens my heart that some of them are also missing out on those great fathers’ input and support.
I am not apportioning blame on any side simply starting that there is a void in a child’s life when fathers are absence.
Any man can father a child but not every man can stick around for the long run. The world is full of “baby daddies’”. We need better male role model that can impart life for good and the better. It will be great if they are the biological dads but we know that it’s not necessary.
Pastor Randy Needham is Caucasian, while I am an African. We have nothing in our background in common except for one thing, God. The love of God is much more powerful than birth parents. The love of God is much more than family history, traditions, languages, color or ethnicity .
Yet, he has impacted my life in so many ways than even I could have foreseen 4 years ago.
Thanks to all the great fathers out there that are looking out for all the fatherless children, long may you all live.
If you happen to be someone that grew up without the love of a loving and present father. There is a father that will never leave you or abandon you ever. His name is Jesus, if you would open your heart to him today and receive him into your life. Things will begin to change for you. He is the friend that sticks closer than a brother. He will be there for you always; he loved you before you love him,
I am grateful for the 14yrs I got to spend with my father, he was not a perfect man but he was the greatest Daddy in the world. He taught me that man can be strong yet so sweet with their children. He was always approachable and never gets bored of listening to me. He took care of us and he spends time with us, which I really enjoyed, and still have many wonderful memories of. In the current world that we live in, most of the time we don’t hear of good fathers and I am glad that I can testify to what a great father he was and a few more God has blessed me with.
This post would not be justified if I did not mention, of course, the father of my own children Adey, who I have watched his interaction with our children and his spiritual leadership.
He is the king and priest of our house and he is also the watchman and gatekeeper of our home. He serves as the spiritual covering for our household.