The Season To Remember Others…….

Its Thanksgiving and I find myself struggling to write something that has that festive feeling appropriate for this season.

At first it just didn’t make sense, and then it occurred to me why? I bet you are curious too.

Not so long ago I actually detested any festive holidays. It was yet another reason to remember my lonely state of mind and how I didn’t have this and that to fill my life with. It was a time to watch others living the life I so longed for.

A few years back I joined my family for yet another Christmas dinner, it was nice of them to include me. The truth was I felt out-of-place, sometimes I can’t help thinking maybe they feel sorry for me and can’t bear to see me spend another festive holiday alone with my Chinese fried rice and wonton soup.

The evening was going great, lovely food and nice company. Just then my nephew asked me a question. “Aunty why don’t we see uncle again”????

Children are just plain honest, aren’t they? They are pure and innocent; they often say things that adults won’t dare! Uncle was my ex. If silence could kill, I wanted to be dead on the spot. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me.

Nobody said a word; it seems like forever before I could muster something sensible out of my big mouth. My lips were dry, the food no longer had any flavor and for a split second innocent nephew wasn’t so cute. 

I must have said something but I can’t remember what, I stayed and spend a few more hours with them and the moment I got into my car, I busted into tears.

I cried from the depth of my soul. I cried because what my nephew said struck a chord with me.

We bring people into our lives and we never know the impact it will have on others. My nephew didn’t understand that we were no longer together. One day, uncle was there and now he’s gone. Then I realized I am becoming the funny Aunty in the family. Every family has either a crazy uncle or a funny aunty.

I was becoming the “funny aunty” and these innocents ones are around to see it? Oh Lord I reject it.  The rest of Christmas was just miserable, I hated the Christmas carol, and I hated the decorations, especially Rudolf the red nose reindeer. Why? I don’t know, I just did!

So as we celebrate Thanksgiving and we are very merry, spare a thought and a prayer for others that are less fortunate. Others that can’t care less for the spirit of the season. The fatherless, motherless, widowed, Orphans, the scorned wife, mom in waiting, the prodigal child, misunderstood husband, the lonely and abandoned. The single, divorced, separated, and the single parents. Those that are homeless, those that are hopeless, those struggling with addiction. That mother, who just miscarried a pregnancy, buried a child, the prodigal sons and daughters wrestling with the decision to return home or not.

The mother who is nursing a painful secret of abortion or adoption. The separated father who remembers his children are out there but can’t even begin to think of how to go about reconciliation after all these decades.

Those in the military, armed services, serving our nation and not spending this time with their family.  Missionaries all over the world serving God, fulfilling their divine calling but still missing their family.

I know and feel your pain; I empathize with you. I wish I can tell you it will get better tonight but I would be lying. You don’t need that from me, it will get better with time though.

As dark and painful things might seem, there is hope in Christ. You don’t have to be religious or even be a Christian to believe in that hope. Jesus came and died for everyone and especially you. He can fill that void and pain right now, just call on to Him. That simple? Yes, go on and try it.

I pray that your tears will soon become tears of joy and not sadness. Your mourning will become dancing, no more sad songs, and may your lips be filled with praises.

May you find forgiveness, peace, love, and joy. Jesus is the reason for the season. May you enjoy his peace and blessings this holiday season.

Thinking of you, you are in my prayers.


About Buky

Buky is a ''Desperado after God". She is married to Adey and together they are raising 3 amazing children. She is a natural encourager, loves sharing practical experiences with others. She enjoys writing, reading, dabbling in stock trading, hanging out with friends and serving the body of Christ.


  1. Tanx for sharing another good piece.It has really spoken to my heart cos i know that i tend to get caught up in the swing of the festive season that i don't really seat down to think of those that r going thru stuff, i pray that God gives me the grace to do the right thing from now on, AMEN.It was nice waking up to read this post. A job well done my friend.

  2. Inspired to act. Thanks!

  3. What an inspiration you are. You have a way with words and you always know what to say and how to deliver your message in such an emotional touching way. Thanks for reminding us to think outside of ourselves. May God comfort every hurting soul out there and may their latter days be better than their former. May they know the hope that is in Christ Jesus and may they know who they are in Christ and what is theirs in Christ. May our troops come home safely and may the lost return home to their family and to God with a repentant heart. May we truly be thankful for the little and the much God has done in our lives and may we have a merry heart now and forever.

    • Blimey, what esle can I add to what you already wrote. You put it so beautifuly and your genuine care and sincerity truly came across. Thank you for the prayers and have a fab thanksgiving.

  4. Bucky,

    Thank you for this post, thank you for caring. I am that woman you wrote about who is deeply depressed every thanksgiving because of something I did years ago around Thanksgiving.

    Every year i dread feeling like this, i want to not remember but i struggle. This year am struggling again, pls keep me in your prayers, everyone who read this please keep me in your prayer. thank you

    • Anonymous Thank you for commenting and i know it takes gut to do this. You are stronger than you know and Jesus loves you. I cant imagine how you are feeling but know that I will be praying for you, stay strong.
      We have all sinned and what is important is to ask for forgiveness. Jesus died so that you dont have to carry this burden around with you. Cast your care unto Him for He cares for you. Learn to forgive yourself, trust Him with your heart and your pain will gradually melt away.

      I am rooting for you.

  5. Buky,
    I believed i came to your site by divine apptment. I was searching for something else and your site came up.

    You words really are a blessing to me, i prayed for someone anyone to just come and help ease the pain away.

    Thank you for thinking and praying for me. I will make it this thankgving.

    • Stacey, I agreed with you that you reading my post is not accidental it is divinely ordained. Thank God that He ministered to you thru this post. You will be in my thoughts and prayers thru this season. You and I with God are a majority all things are possible. Yes! you will make it this thanksgiving and many more to come. I pray that the spirit of thanksgiving will never depart from you. Amen.

  6. @ Buky…Lovely piece,surely you have just got yourself a regular caller now, make sure there is plenty for me and possibly to take away oh….lol. Well I shouldn't expect anything less. Thanksgiving/Praises are weapon we all need to access the continued and undying love of God. I have learnt this now especially with what God has been doing to me in the last 1 year, something I know myself I truly don't deserve. Thank you Lord and I will never seize to praise and give thanks to YOU for all you have done and will be doing in the future.

    @ Anonymous, I sincerely feel you but you need to understand that we all have sinned at one time or the other and thus come short of HIS glory. But what can only please GOD is for you to truly acknowledge your misdeed and do them no more. If you do this, HE is everly a forgiving GOD, HE will surely not cut short his supply of blessings from you. Please go out there, praise and give thanks to HIM. I am sure Buky will remember you in her prayers like requested and I promise I will too. God bless you as you thank and praise HIM

    • Abayomi, Thanks for your support believe me when i say i truly appreciate it. I Thank God that you have an excellent testimony and a heart full of praise and thanksgiving. May the joy of thanksgiving never depart from your life in Jesus name, Amen.

      Thank you for your advice and payer to anonymous and pls keep him/her in your prayers too.

  7. Wow, Great message here. God bless you!

  8. Wow, aunty Buki you have really walked in my shoes.
    Do you have any tips you could share on how to deal with such?

    • Nike, Those were one of my many real life experiences. I understand too well how depressing these times can be for others. Regardless of how I felt, I always had hope, I traveled into the future that I so wanted. Usually towards the end of the year I set new goals and vision for myself. I face the ugly truth about myslelf, no one knows you like you. So if anyone is going to tell you the truth it is you. I take an inventory of what i did well and what I can improve upon in the new year. I address all my weaknesses so that I can work on them. I make myself the "project" in the new year and work on me. I find that if I can do even one little thing about me then that makes me feel alot better. You cant change others but you can change yourself. Never lose sight of hope no matter how bad things get.

      Even when my walk with God was not that great, I believed that God was a good God. I know that He loves me even though I didnt always feel it. I took the bible at his words and that was very comforting to me. I love reading Psalms especially, there are lots of chapters that truly bring comfort to my broken spirit.

      Nike, you are in my thoughts and prayers and I mean that from my heart. When I started this blog I never realised how much connected I'd feel to you all. Nike you are not just someone that leaves a comment or a number on how well my blog is doing. You are me and I was you. Your story was my story and My testimony will be yours and much more in Jesus name, Amen.

      Your best days are ahead of you.

  9. Thank you Aunty Buky. Your words are truly golden. Your life is a testimony which is why you had to go through what you went though- to give glory to God and give people like myself hope. Isaiah 48:10-12

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