These are some helpful tips to help navigate those tough times while you wait on God to conceive your precious babies.
Please feel free to add to these lists as we learn and grow together.
Whether you chose to go through IVF, Natural or Adoption route you still need God’s guidance and agreement with your husband. Children are a gift and blessing and they will bring you a lot of joy and sleepless nights, lol.
They are not the source of happiness and they do not solve problems or a hectic lifestyle, they add to it.
It is very important to work on your marriage before you bring children into it as they can compound the problems you ignore.
Get right with God today, invest quality time in developing a personal relationship with God. Church attendance is not the same thing as a personal relationship with God.
Deal with issues from your past. Confront and put them behind you and start a brand new start. Forgive yourself.
Husband and wife should study the Word and pray together daily, if possible.
You should be attending the same church together, which is also a great place to find support and encouragement from experienced couples.
Find a prayer partner; surround yourself with people who can pray. Not everyone can truly pray for/with you or stay the course. Join a prayer group.
Be in agreement with your husband in prayer; it’s vital to your prayers being answered. God is a God of order. He honors authority and submission. Men are not just sperm donor, but they play a very important role as watchmen and gate-keepers of the home.
Husbands lay hands on your wife’s stomach and pray for her. Take your rightful place.
Husbands – you are her covering; protect her and don’t let your family or friends talk to her inappropriately regarding her not being pregnant yet. Protect her.
Husbands – please be more sensitive to your wives around this time. When she is crying is not the time to be logical or have a frank conversation. Just be there to listen and reassure her that all is well.
Wives let us not forget that our husbands are hurting too, they don’t show it but they feel our pain and are struggling that they can’t fix this. They are the silent warriors that are often pushed to the side. Don’t forget to minister to him too.
Walk in love with everyone, I know it’s hard. I had to forgive those I didn’t want to forgive, but when I think of what I will be depriving myself because of un-forgiveness? There was no comparison. Let it Go! Love intentionally!
If someone gets under your skin too much to the extent they are affecting your love walk. Please reduce your exposure to them until you are strong enough to deal with it.
Avoid conflict between yourselves; remember you are both on the same side. Learn to walk away from strife and be quick to forgive. “Temptations to sin are sure to come, but woe to the one through whom they come! Luke 17:1, ESV.
Keep yourself healthy, not just your weight but your spirit being. Avoid feeding yourself junk and make time for spiritual food that nourishes far better.
Occupy yourself with happy thought and practice laughter frequently e.g. watch comedies. A happy heart is like good medicine, but a broken spirit drains your strength. Proverbs 17:22.
Education – Finish your education if you can. it is a lot to juggle if you are studying, working and being a new parent. While it’s doable, it can also be stressful to a new and challenging season of your life.
Savings – Use this time wisely to have a healthy bank account, you will need it. Having a first child can bring out in you a side you’ve never seen before. You have waited this long for a child, who cares about the cost? You will have to keep a cool head and not spend it all at once.
Travel – If you can afford it take time off and enjoy each other, trying for a baby can be stressful. Take mini vacations if you can’t afford to be away too long. Our first child was conceived while we were on a week break to Colorado. We loooove Colorado!!!
Write about all of your experiences; good and bad. Keep a journal, don’t rely on your memory, once you get pregnant your memory is never the same. I wished I’d started blogging way back when I was dealing with mine. It’s never too late. Start today!
Pay off your debt – Children are very very expensive. You are going to need every penny! Pay off your car notes, credit cards and all debts with high interest rate.
Lose weight and stay healthy – The less weight you are carrying around the better for your state of mind. Take care of yourself because you are worth it.
Transition to a new career – This is the perfect time to transition to a new career, not when the baby is here. It might just be the distraction you need. Adey transitioned to a new career so that he could be around more, be willing to pay the price.
Study the Word now – Dig deep in the Word and find scriptures that speak to you. Stand on the word of God. Once those babies arrives, huh! It is a different ball game, trust me. Can you imagined; now that we have 2 children it is almost a struggle for me to have my regular time with the Lord? God forbid that now that we are blessed we ignored the One who blessed us!!
Enjoy your partner – Enjoy this time now, hang out with your lover! Come together regularly and enjoy each other while trying to conceive. Once those babies get here you might not have much time. Enjoy the time while you have it!
Adey and I are always trying to fit time for ourselves now, it can be a lot of work. Our babysitters are fast becoming our new “bestfriends”.
Learn a new hobby or craft – I took up bead making and sewing, I was absolutely crappy at them both, lol. I still have my sewing machine to remind me today!
Wishing you all the best with your new family! The Lord has not forgotten you. It shall come to pass in Jesus name, Amen!
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