I came across a blog days ago and it just refreshes my soul and also reminded me of a promise I made to myself in 2007 to give myself the permission to SHINE.
We all need a little reminder from time to time, and since reading the blog, I have been reflecting all over again about that promise.
As a child, my mum told me that I was never shy at all. I am the last child that had to be dragged away from the school play kicking and screaming. I was the little girl that hugs the limelight at another’s child birthday party, which you would almost mistake for the celebrant.
Life happens and after one knock and several more, you start to shy away from your real self. Words spoken by others in anger can also crush us to the core. We refuse to take a leading role in our own lives and start playing the supportive role instead.
While there is nothing wrong with that, the time has come for you to stop hiding away and taking being humble to a ridiculous level. You are missing out in your moment of glory, your time to shine is being passed over to others simply because you have forgotten to give yourself the permission to shine and stand out of the pack.
I am confident that your intentions are genuine; you don’t want to appear overly confident, arrogant and prideful. So instead of doing the presentation at work, you did all the work but passed it on to someone else to shine. There you are, on the sideline, again. Watching others live your life while you sadly refuse to take your rightful place.
Ok guys, enough already!!! I am not just talking to you, I am talking to myself. There is nothing wrong with standing out this year. There is nothing wrong about getting recognition for your good works; there is nothing wrong with living your life as you envision it in your head, in the open
You must permit yourself to shine. God is not going to come down and do it for you; it’s a decision that you have to make for yourself.
I had to make that decision for myself in 2007 while I was in bible school. I went to bible school to discover me. I had so many questions and I know that if I can take the time out to seek God I will have those answers. Well I did get the answers, but what good was it if I wasn’t going to do anything about it? In bible school I shy away from talking publicly, I refuse to have anything to do with the microphone.
When I was called to share my testimony or to lead prayer I would freeze. Even though on the inside I was dying to share my testimony. I wanted to lead prayer because I love praying. Many good people made several attempts for me to step out and lead but I reluctantly shy away from it. I was offered the opportunity to start a group teaching Financial Peace by Dave Ramsey and I passed up the opportunity because I just won’t stand and lead. Even though I had study all of Dave Ramsey Financial peace series and I am passionate about it.
I have missed out on many great offers and opportunity to be a blessing to others. Sometimes you need to trust that those offering you more responsibilities believe in your leadership abilities.
While I was at bible school, I was taught to discover my own voice, my own message, and what I was born to do, my purpose and then discover who my audiences are. You are not called to everyone, but those you are called to will cherish what you have to share.
It’s not about being the best or perfect; it’s about being you and giving yourself the permission to shine.
Once I discover my voice, my message, who my audiences are, I had to give myself the permission to shine. That is not being arrogant or attention seeking, it’s not being overly confident or seeking fame. It’s being me and doing what I am born to do.
This year you are coming out of your comfort zone, you are going to leave the old you behind, you are going to dare to do those things in your head you have written down in your dream journals. This year you must shine.
No more excuses, no more timidity, just do you. What do you have to lose? Live your life intentionally; get out of your own way and shine.
Let me tell you what you might lose, some friends that are holding you back for sure, but think about what you will gain. You will be inspired, you will try new things, you will be full of energy and creativity, you will lose weight in the process, and you will dress differently. You will get your mojo back and have a bounce in your steps. You will be full of joy and you will see opportunities that were never there before. The world will be your runway and you will be the architect of your own life.
This year if you don’t do anything else, you must give yourself the permission to shine. You know that you can’t keep playing second fiddle to yourself. Stop hiding away the gift and talent that are dying to bust out to bless others.
Stop focusing on you alone, think about others! It’s not all about you, think about the lives that you will change and transform. You have enough experience, you don’t need more classes, you don’t need more coaching, and you don’t need to lose more weight before you take to the stage. You don’t need more designer clothes, you already have what it takes, you are the real deal, you are the total package and the rest will fall into place as you go.
The world need what you have on the inside, no one can walk like you, no one can put it together like you, no one can speak like you. Your life experiences are a showstopper and no one can compete with your story, your writing, your testimony, your gift and talent.
I am tempted to ask you what your excuses are? But I don’t want to hear it; you have been touting the same excuses for years, enough already! I want to hear your dreams instead and what you intend to do about it. You will never know what is waiting for you until you take a simple step to stand and shine.
A Reminder: If you don’t say, “Here I am”, nobody will say, “there you are”
This post is a reminder to myself to not return back to my hiding place, just because you got free of something once doesn’t mean that you can’t easily return back there. Since finishing bible school I gave myself the permission to shine, I made a promise to God that while I won’t go out of my way seeking the “next big idea”. If He opens the door, then I will walk thru it.
I have been walking thru open doors ever since. Am not talking about a show with my name on it. It is God bringing little opportunities here and there to allow me to become confident and gradually build upon my confident while at the same time horn my skills.
Once I could not stand and address a crowd of 10 and now I am addressing hundreds. Every time I do it, I am still afraid to begin with. But once I step into it something happens, I can’t describe it except it’s no longer about me, it’s about the message I want to get across. It’s about God and letting Him do that which only Him can do.
There will always be that shy part of me that just want to sit in a corner and happy for everyone else to shine. I need that part of me to always keep me humble and never believe the hype about myself.
Don’t confuse that shy part of yourself for the real you. You are more equipped than you know, you are over-qualified to do it, start where you are and live your life intentionally.
Until you give yourself the permission to shine and soar like an eagle this year, those opportunities will not open up, even if they do, what is the point? You are not going to recognize it.
I was giving the opportunity to address a group of young single moms of about 2,000. When I heard the numbers, I froze. I opened my mouth and basically talked the person out of having me as the speaker. This was an offer that was given to me because I had spoken so passionately about my own personal experiences, about the mistakes I made and I don’t want others to make the same. I was the one that sold myself without being aware of it to at the time, yet I was the same person that told them I wasn’t ready!
You too have wondered why great opportunities have come your way while you didn’t even put any effort into seeking it. Every time you speak, you can’t help but talk passionately about those things that matter to you. You may not be aware of it but it comes across to others.
What you must now do is give yourself the permission to shine and stand out. It is ok and you will not fall flat on your face. When you step into your future, when you decided to pick up your cross and do that which you are born to do. God will back you up with all the spiritual and internal resources that you never knew was available.
You are about to discover what makes others looks like they have the “IT FACTOR”. All they have done is gave themselves permission to be themselves. Stop waiting on people to validate you, haven’t you waited long enough? Run to God to train you and allow you to shine. When your motives becomes about helping others and using your God-given gift and talent to bless others, I guaranteed you that the floodgate of heaven will open to you and help will come from unknown sources that you least expected – random act of kindness.
I am going to continue to shine, unleash the real you and shine too. Let us shine together, you are not alone and it will be so much fun.
Yes there will be some naysayer along the way; there will be some Sanballat and Tobiah. They are obstacles in your way but they are necessary for the journey. Identify them quickly and don’t pay much attention to what they have to say, if you expect them to be the voice of discouragement their words won’t carry much power.
Another reminder: “Opinions are a dime a dozen, everybody’s got one”
Learn to filter what information you allow into your spirit, stay focus on your dream, write them down and run with it. Don’t let fear steal your joy and your shine away.
The future is looking even brighter because you have given yourself the permission to shine. Shine is differently for everyone: for some it may be the time to finally tackle that excess weight that really makes you feels uncomfortable and is the real excuse behind you hiding away.
For another, it may be your wardrobe that you need to work on. Some men would love to wear a bow tie or cravat for the first time in their life but are shy that their friends may laugh at them. Just do it, don’t just buy one bow-ties or cravats, but 7, one for each day. Wear it, go visit those people, take the bull by the head and wear it consistently so they can talk and get over it quickly.
Maybe you are like me, I fancy wearing more dresses; I think I only own one dress right now. My comfort zone is a trouser suit and that is about to change, I am going to get me some dresses and skirt too, lol.
Seriously, it’s taking little step each time, it’s not all about the giant steps. Maybe you have been thinking of starting a prayer group or a book club at home, write that book, launch that new business, take up a new hobby, grow out your Afro, move in a new circle of friends, ask that sister out and she might just say yes!
What is it that you want to do, tell me, I’m all ears.
I bet you are curious about the blog I read that jumpstart all of this, please check out Tolulope’s Musings I hope that after reading his blog, that it propels you to emerge from hiding and arise and shine, and let your light shine before man.
Isaiah 60:1 Arise, shine; for your light has come! And the glory of the Lord is risen upon you.
Food for thought: You are born to stand out, why then are you trying to fit in?
WOW!!!! Beautifully said!
I love this part…"you are not called to everyone, but those you are called to will cherish what you have to share."
I remember being the "shy" girl who always did all the work and hid behind the scenes…but after discovering who I was in Christ it all changed!!! I'm so much bolder and confident now…I still have mY days but this post this encouraged me to SHINE always!!!!
Thanks…you're the best! You should write a book ;-).
Blessing, I am glad that you have left the shy girl behind you and as you continue to shine, I pray that you keep shining brightly forever more.
Everytime I read your blog,I get blessed.
You are an inspiration. A lot of women are I'd say 'victims' of hiding away from shining. We always like to be at the backgroup;I guess maybe because we are always giving up ourselves to the man or our children. We always want to be at the receiving end. But I believe we deserve to shine and take the opportunities to shine.
Thank you Buki.God bless you.
Lara, You are correct, as women we need to constantly remind ourselves to shine. I know i can easily slip back into hiding and we must never permit that. Take care friend.
Straight from your heart, Buki. You took this much farther than I did. I could not stop reading it until the end. There is almost nothing more to say. One thing i got from it though is that each one of us have the key to our own destinies. We either restrain ourselves or we unleash ourselves. I love your statement that people who appear to have IT are no different from us, they just gave themselves permission to be who they are, no apologies to anyone for being who they are. I need to read it again. Thank you for being an inspiration and for giving your readers permission to shine as you shine.
Tolulope, I have to say a BIG THANK YOU for writing that post. I am so glad that Lara Daniels posted a link to your blog on twitter. You are a talented writer and your blog really inspire me, I am a loyal follower.
I just saw this. Thank you Buky. I consider myself blessed to have come in contact with you both. You are an encouragement to me. By the way, I had sent an email to you over the weekend asking you to check my new page – but it was undelivered. Please check at your convenience. You have a beautiful new design.
Great Post,
You have reaffirmed to me and summed up beautifully, what the Lord has been impressing on me over the last month, and which I have already started working on, as mentioned in my last post titled, ‘Full stops are places of refreshing’.
I reached a point in my life where I stamped my feet, drew a line in the sand and said, “Enough is enough – I am going to be the person God made me to be!”
As children of God, we should not be hiding our light under the bushel, we should be making a difference and we should look different. God is calling us to be bold, because He hasn’t given us a spirit of fear, but of POWER.
If we want to possess God’s promises, we have to do more than say declarations and confessions and just talk about God’s promises. We have to be relentless in our pursuit of God’s promises, step out in the limelight and SHINE for HIM every day.
Buky, thank you for stirring us up, I pray that ALL who read your post will not just read it, but put it into action.
I thank God for your life.
Ms. Carole, your post is really amazing, God must have been talking to us at the same time!! It is our season, our year to SHINE.
Sometimes I stroll down memory lane and get very angry at myself for the times I had the opportunity to shine but refused to take the reins all in the name of being humble. Years down the line, no one seem to care or reason or even understand that I was trying to be humble, they felt I've got no life or my esteem is overwhelming me. All that changed from my service year to my masters level I love the transformation and opportunities that have eluded me have started queueing at my door, My redeemer has been so awesome in helping me get to the seat of kings also. It is indeed our right to shine and not allow other people do it for us. Thanks
Ayodele – No more looking back in anger. Its all part of the journey to learn to stand and SHINE from now on. That was why i listed the opportunities that i missed out on. I learnt valuable lessons from them and am taking my stand to SHINE. Let us SHINE together this year.
I like the message… The thing is I am actually not a shy person. I like talking, meeting new people and just having a laugh. I actually dont get scared when addressing the crowd, infact I love it. I inspire one day to be a motivational speaker. But at the moment, I have a desire to share the love of JESUS not in a typical way (giving papers etc) but giving gifts etc. I have made up billion and one excuses as to why I cant do it now, or when I should do it and how to do it. Its like IBK just DO IT… I have so many passion its unbelieveable, I will pursue it, I want to believe I can NOW…Then its like there is time for everything, and I have prayed about it. I am starting in a little way, i guess.
Thank you BUKY, this site is my reference point.
DOZ – Start by taking little step from today toward your dreams. Its never too late or too early, everyday is a brand new day so take advantage of it. No more excuses, you have all the right tools on the inside of you, YOU GO GIRL.
This is a wakeup call once again.
As l read through your blog, l recall times l used to shy away from opportunities to lead the choir as a kid or make presentations at work. The few times l chose to stand out and do something, l felt lighter and happier. God has deposited diverse gifts and talents in us, until we take bold steps to use them, they remain dormant.
Talking about shining, l learnt a big lesson at work. We were in a product development meeting when an idea came to my mind and instead of raising my hand to say it; l whispered it into my boss’s ears. Before one could say Jack Robinson, this man raised his hand up and said it. LOL I was stunned! Most times we are scared of being wrong, but we can’t tell until we try.
I had to take a look at you picture again, u certainly don't look someone who wears only trouser suits! I perceive you to be very lady-like…unlike me, so tomboyish :) I'm also working on looking more lady-like and for once wow my fashionista sisters!
As a 9year old girl, someone made a comment about my 'fat legs'. It stuck in my mind and l never had a knee length skirt even in university! Little did l know l had hmm… l will keep that to myself ;)
Most importantant lesson learnt: 'If you don’t say, “Here I am”, nobody will say, “there you are”.
LOL @ 'I was the little girl that hugs the limelight at another’s child birthday party, which you would almost mistake for the celebrant'.
Stay blessed!
Ekundayo – As per that picture? That was taken on a day i just had a makeup make over, and i was looking fab. Shame i dont alway look like that because am home chasing toddlers all day long. But hey watch out girl, I am going to become a fashionista soon.
Someone told me the same thing about my legs back in secondary school and i hid away in trousers. Words are powerful and we shouldnt allow it to keep us from enjoying life. So get yourself some hot pencil skirt girl!!
Are you sure you did not have a meeting with God before the start of this year to discuss Blimey? All your posts this year have been narrowly directed at me. I feel i am under attack to succeed and move ahead. Joyce Meyer started it off by sending me a magnet thing that says "Be a Risk Taker" after i read that, i immediately removed the cover over my Linkedin account and decided to network like never before. We must all reach our potential and shine like the city upon a hill that cannot be hidden.
Bring it on pal and push me on to success! Love you
Blimey, Yep God is certainly talking to us all to SHINE this year. This is our time, I am so glad that we all get to do this together and i cant wait to hear all the testimonies too. Stay blessed.
Excellent write, refreshing blog template, maintain the good work
Jeremy, thank you and thank you again. Welcome to bukville and i hope you stick around.
Oh my !Oh my!I wish I can tell you how I feel about this post ;in French,in Kirundi(my native language) but I am just speechless…You are truly a God sent.Today is my Birthday and my wonderful Savior used you to deliver my gift!May God bless you,keep you , may His face shine on you and give you more wisdom.
Mahoro25,
Joyeux Anniversaire à vous mon cher ami – Happy birthday to you my dear friend. God will crown the years with joy and peace. May your light continue to shine brightly as you grow in heavenly wisdom.
Buky,
I suppose I have been missing a lot in the last 1 month of my self imposed exile from the web. Surely, I have got a lot of catch ups to do.
I call this 'Buky's master-class'. You have really addressed the issue in a very depth. A menace that most of us fear so much that makes us run away from shining is 'Failure' forgetting that we can only shine when we believe that failure has no place with God.
Like you said, I have made up my mind to give every thought that has been planted in me by God a good go because there lies what will make me SHINE in 2011 onward.
Cheers!!!
Wow……… I use to make excuses for myself why I dont deserve to do things for myself, excuses that arent really excuses but my insecurities telling me I dont deserve nice things. You are right, sometimes we do take humility to a different level.
Wow! Very enriching and motivating indeed. Thank you! I liked the part about everyone having their opinions, we have to get to the point where God's word supercedes every other voice or opinion! Thanx for this, it blessed me.
Aaaaaw! *ears full* Buky (sighs!) U're such an awesome lady! Thanks for this post. I'm the type who reserves her potentials,talents and abilities for the future; but for christ's sake,THE FUTURE IS NOW! Thanks for making us discover the "inner us". My spirit is so lifted right now.
@ Abayomi – Welcome back and sometimes we all could do with the self imposed exile. It is needful to recharge our batteries. I am so excite for you this year and cant wait to see you shine.
@ Folasade – You deserved the best of the best. If you dont who does? Remember it is your Father good pleasure to give you the best. So take your rightful place in His Kingdom and claim all that is yours. Shine girl, shine.
@ Oghale – Only God has the final say and authorit. He will perfect all that concerns His children, thanks for your comment.
@ Tolulope Ilesanmi – No, I am the one indeed blessed, thanks for being a blessing.
@ Cella – Wow, Yes THE FUTURE IS NOW, I feel your determination this year, its gonna be great!!!
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